The MDI Code of Honor - The First Tenet Commitment Before Ego

The Code of Honor was created by the men of what was then known as the Sterling Men’s Divisions. It was intended to reflect some very basic core values that all the men could rally behind, support and use as a benchmark for the ways of being we could expect from one another.



Back in the late 1990s some men from the Western Region (the Bay area around Sasn Francisco) created an ark which contained 15 different pieces of word. Each stick was made of a specific type of wood and bore a specific design that reflected the way in which the men of the Western Region related to the tenets of the Code of Honor. Charlie Fleischheimer spearheaded that effort. The ark has since made its way throughout North America and men throughout MDI have had the opportunity to connect with it. I had the opprotunity to safe guard it for a while and was moved to write a little about my relationship to each tenet. What follows is the treatise that was created as a companion piece to the ark.



First Tenet of the Code

Commitment Before Ego



Wood: Manzanita – A strong hearty tree that grows in some of the most barren environments. Where other things have difficulty surviving, Manzanitas continue to grow and branch outward. A commitment driven by a powerful context will flourish like the Manzanita tree.



Symbol: Coyote – In Native American mythology, the Coyote is the trickster, the clever one who often tricks himself with his own cleverness.



To be successful, a man must possess a strong and healthy ego. However, a man’s ego can consume him if he has not learned how to master it. Without a strong set of core values, I have often found myself drawn to doing what felt good wthout giving any thought to the ramifications. Any man living life without a clear sense of his commitment will find himself being led by whatever happens to be at hand in the moment (usually his feelings or his ego). His life is one of reaction rather than proaction.



Commitment before Ego demands two disciplines:



· To practice and possess a firm understanding and adherence to one’s purpose and commitment; and,

· To hold an iron mastery over one’s ego.



Many people equate commitment to making a pledge or promise to do something. Actually commitment is action. Commitment shows up not in what we say in the passion of a moment or even the things we do when spurred on by others or when things are going well. The benchmark of your commitment is evidenced by your actions when the underlying reasons behind your words seem challenged. When you no longer wish to be held to what you said. When there appears to be no reward for following through. When quitting looks like an attractive option. This is where the Ego has fertile ground to play its tricks.



There are many definitions and theories about the ego. Although Native Americans embody it in the form of a Coyote, it is more elusive than that. It is usually easier for others to see Ego governing our actions than it is for us. when I find myelf needing to defend or explain my actions, it is usually a good indction that my ego is engaged. rarely do you feel compelled to justify ctions driven by commitment becasue the actions speak for themselves. When I am operating out of commitment, I am more interested in doing than discussing.



This tenet is not Commitment over Ego. It is Commitment Before Ego. By that we mean let your commitment lead your ego rather than the other way around. The need to look good is Ego before commitment. The desire to do good is Commitment before ego.



There is nothing wrong with doing things because they feel good. I am a firm believer in the notion of “enlightened self interest”. I do good not because I am altruistic and aspire to be Ghandi. There is always something very definite in it for me. The key is to know what that pay off is so that I can keep my ego in check and be honest with myself about my motivations. Fortunately, the men around me will help me to find ways to feed my ego while adhering to a higher commitment than just my personal self interest.